Razing Expectations, Part One
What do you do when a friend wishes you a Happy New Year, but it’s nothing close to happy?
How do you rejoice with the co-worker that says, “I’m so excited about what’s coming this year,” when deep inside you’re dreading what’s ahead and your only wish is to reverse time and erase some incidences?
A few moons ago, I was there. In fact, I was obligated to host a post New Years Christmas party, forced to fake a smile and hold back tears while my insides battled the shock and trauma of what had just hit me like a demolition ball.
If the above resonates, then this post will be a safe and encouraging read for you.
From Recognized to Vaporized
When someone tells you they’re starting their life over from scratch, this doesn’t mean beginning a new relationship, a new family, or a new job. These might become part of the package later on, but we can’t brush past the determining issues that are much broader, deeper, more painful, and often traumatizing. To a significant degree, this person has survived a serious destruction of life. (I’m keeping this post vague, but you know if this describes you.)
For me, it was when what I loved was abruptly amputated from my life. It was when the journey, to which I had dedicated myself, unexpectedly vaporized, and I was left in a vacuum.
Starting over occurs when everything you were intimately familiar with suddenly has to be razed to the ground so God can build a new foundation. I’m not talking hoisting up an old house with a crane so the workers can fix the mess beneath. I mean a total destruction of the house in order to lay a new and healthy foundation that’s fit to build upon.
Out of a Haze and into a Maze
Have you faced injustice and survived? Bravo! Now you might be asking, “What’s next?”
Right before Christmas, a year or two ago, a friend of mine revealed that her husband woke up that morning and announced, “I don’t want to be married to you anymore. I’m leaving.” Bam!—life changed in an instant. Her birthday was also a couple days away making it a double whammy. Entering the new year didn’t soften her harsh reality.
God wants to restore, and He’s an expert at establishing foundations. But what does this restoration process look like inside the heart?
- How do you go from being in shock to being thankful in all situations?
- From panic-stricken to laughing again?
- From depressed to joyful?
- From wounded to healed?
- From shattered to whole?
Photo by Unsplash
Two Visions
If you or someone you care about is undergoing this shocked and shattered experience, my heart goes out to you. A season this traumatic can feel like the end of the world. You might even be thinking, I can’t go on like this. I prayerfully pass along to you hope, strength, and courage to live another day … and to keep living. Hope might be hiding, but I promise it’s right in front of you.
I am Yahweh, your mighty God!
Isaiah 41:13 (TPT)
I grip your right hand and won’t let you go!
I whisper to you:
‘Don’t be afraid; I am here to help you!’
A few years ago, in the beginning of my starting-over season, God gave me many living visions, or visuals, that helped my heart understand certain aspects of His restoration process. One of these visuals was of me sitting in the middle of the floor and surrounded by a thousand unidentifiable shards.
In another vision, He showed me a Rubik’s cube. The vision of the unidentifiable pieces reflected my reality, but this cube shifted my perspective on everything. And you’ll soon see why.
picture by Pixabay
Over the next couple of weeks, I will unpack both of these visions. I believe they will encourage those of you who have found yourself in the unexpected, unnerving, and unpredictable position — starting your life over from scratch.
So if someone wished you a happy new year, and it’s not, don’t feel guilty about razing their expectations for your life. Find a safe place where you can take off the mask and just be you during this journey. Grieve well, pray hard, and trust the MasterBuilder to remove the debris and rebuild according to His divine dimensions.
To be continued…
