When Someone Tells You To “Just get over it!”

“Just get over it,” your brother tells you after you break up with the boyfriend.

You were clearly cheated out of winning a medal or a scholarship, and your classmate scoffs, “Just get over it, would you?”

When you bring up the pain caused by your ex, and your “friend” rolls her eyes and utters, “Would you please just get over him.”

The company admin passes around more cruel rumors about you, and your co-worker whispers nonchalantly, “You just have to get over it.”

You tell your spouse how much their mean words hurt you, and they hiss at you, “Get over it!”

For Pete’s sake, will you just get over it?! (Who exactly is “Pete” anyway?)

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Do you get over it? Can you? Should you?

Okay, if we’re talking about frustration over the store that no longer stocks your favorite ice cream or the Amazon package that arrived damaged and you have to return it. Yes, shake off those trifling frustrations because they’re not worth sweating over. (Remember that book titled “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff”?)

We get over boulders and hurdles in our path that are there to make our muscles stronger. We get over the flu, which, hopefully, strengthens our immune system. We get over the fact we have to reschedule a flight.

But when it comes to the bigger issues that wound your heart, don’t believe the lie that “just getting over it” will lead to healing. This phrase denies a you your feelings and denies the hurt that you — not them — are enduring.

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We do NOT simply get over the deeper wounds…

Instead, we plow right through them!

Did your best friend wound you by spreading lies about you? Plow straight into the pain, and call it what it is. Give the grief and sorrow to God, and as you do, ask Him to give you His interpretation of the event, which might surprise you. Let His Word declare the beautiful truth of who you are in His eyes. Then choose to forgive your friend, and in doing so, leave all vengeance in God’s hands. Don’t allow bitterness to take root. Don’t allow the enemy to win any part of your heart, for the devil is a vicious thief!

Did your husband/wife cheat on you and then tell you, “It was nothing. Get over it.”?  NO! Don’t fall into the denial trap. Instead, plow right into the throbbing heartache of that wound. Find a safe place to vent your pain and sorrow. Betrayal does severe damage to the soul, and to ignore it is to invite rejection to eat away at you, one poisonous bite at a time. Choosing to forgive the betrayer is a process, and healing usually happens in layers. By the way, your healing process is never subject to someone else’s timeline or demands.

To settle for getting over it is to live in denial. Living in denial often means that part of you goes numb and dies inside. Let’s treat the phrase “get over it” as the gangrene of the soul.

Now, picture your painful circumstance this way. There’s a ten-foot high haystack blocking your path (the wounding event). Get over it? No. Skirt around it? No.

Imagine yourself running full force right into that giant haystack, arms stretched wide and screaming at the top of your lungs. Picture all the blades of hay dispersing and flying every-which-way, like an explosion after a dynamite blast. It might take a day, a week, month, or a year… but by the grace of God, you will come out on the other side of that ugly haystack.

And when you turn around to look at the faithful work you’ve accomplished with the help of the Holy Spirit, you’ll no longer see the obstacle. All you’ll see is a bunch of hay scattered around, amounting to nothing! You’ll see the effects your victory over the enemy. You’ll be stronger, wiser, and—best of all—you’ll be free from emotional and spiritual bondage.

Going through, not over = the path of a spiritual champion. 

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Attempting to just get over an issue puts you at risk of being held down and driven by emotional pain for the rest of your life. Getting over it is leaving the backdoor open to the enemy of your soul to storm in and rule over your heart, mind, and behavior.

Confess and acknowledge how you have offended one another and then pray for one another to be instantly healed, for tremendous power is released through the passionate, heartfelt prayer of a godly believer.

James 5:16 TPT

So the next time someone tells you to just get over it, you tell them, “Nope. God and I are plowing through this one. Watch me live!”

Sowing Seeds of Bravery to Triumph!